Manolo for the Home

Director Roland Emmerich bought a house in the Knightsbridge district of London, only to find out that his new ‘hood was a little staid for his tastes. Presumably to ensure that he wasn’t unduly influenced by the relative conservatism of his neighbors, he (according to a slideshow in the NY Times) “instructed the designer, John Teall, of Flux Interiors, to make it so that ‘when the neighbors peek in, they might want to call the police or something.’ A taxidermy zebra faces the living room, which reflects his predilection for art with a political edge.”

Ooh, cheeky. I rather like the dolls in the fireplace.

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Pictures like this really don’t need much commentary.

Someone either loves the U.S.A. very much or they just plain like red, white, and blue. I’m all for big gestures, so I can’t criticize this kind of paint job.

But I can say that if you’re going to go all-American on your ‘hood’s ass, please don’t decorate with a couple of these:

Or this:

Or, for the love of all that’s beautiful, an entire set of these:

Happy Fourth!

Modernization was the buzzword — if they indeed had buzzwords — in the pre- and post second world war years. Design, architecture, and urban development bordered on futuristic during the Mid-Century Modern (MCM) period, yet the philosophy incorporated natural shapes, simplicity, and democratic design.

I’m not always a fan of modern design because I think too much of it is what it is because its creators were hoping to attain the right look, I do like MCM homes. When done right, form and function balanced each other out. There’s no bulk for bulk’s sake — spaces and furniture were (and still are) designed to be open, accessible, functional, and pleasant.

Mid-Century Modern Furniture describes the MCM movement thusly:

A time when new technology combined with the sensibilities of the day allowed for a myriad of possibilities. The result: an “honest” design philosophy that has withstood the test of time. Fifty years later, the works of these groundbreaking architects and designers, including George Nelson, Charles and Ray Eames, Mies van der Rohe, Eero Saarinen, Harry Bertoia, Jens Risom, Florence Knoll, Isamu Noguchi, Jean Prouve, and Verner Panton among others, are more popular than ever.

Plus, you can’t beat the colors…oh, how I love the colors!

Radar won’t detect THIS chair from Blu Dot! Its faceted surfaces give it a very low radar signature because it can radiate almost all of the radar energy away from the receiver. Okay, maybe I’m making all of this up, but I can’t help it if my brain says B-2 when I look at this particular piece of furniture.

2Modern says: “Powder-coated steel ships flat and folds along laser-cut lines to create a dynamic and comfortable chair. As skinny as a supermodel, yet far more sturdy.”

I don’t necessarily know that I want my furniture to be as skinny as a supermodel. Furniture from my local discount store is as skinny as a supermodel and that isn’t good. I wouldn’t mind, however, if my furniture was as study as a F-117 Nighthawk because that’s pretty dang sturdy. Unlike the Nighthawk, the Real Good chair is available in ivory, aqua, and red.

Oh, MetroSofa, you minx! Temptress! Or is that tempter? I mean, really now, is an only seating shop traditionally male or female? It doesn’t matter. Your antique-modern aesthetic makes me want to light all of the furniture in my house on fire just so I have an excuse to buy more.

Seriously — classic styles merge with hip fabrics in a perfect blend of old and new. They start with recyclable or antique wood frames that would otherwise end up in a landfill and work their magic to make them beautiful again, choosing “paints, fabrics, cushions and finishes with green production and manufacturing in mind.” Yep, green as in eco-friendly so you can feel good about your chair…unless you had to torch all your existing chairs to get it.

Plus, if you don’t like any of the chairs you see below, you can custom design your own!

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This is just too cool not to share, even though there’s a goodly chance you’ve already seen it on Metafilter or Gizmodo on in the NYT, where the story originated.

Now, I love puzzles — even when I can’t solve the razzafrackin things — and if I had the money, I’d spend millions of dollars to have architectural designer Eric Clough hide all manner of brain-twisters in my house, just like he did for Steven B. Klinsky and Maureen Sherry.

…some of that furniture and some of those walls conceal secrets — messages, games and treasures — that make up a Rube Goldberg maze of systems and contraptions…The apartment even comes with its own book, part of which is a fictional narrative that recalls “The Da Vinci Code”…It has its own soundtrack, too, with contributions by Kate Fenner, a young Canadian singer and songwriter…

It started during the design process, when Klinsky asked that a poem he had written for and about his family be lodged in a wall somewhere and Sherry suggested hiding it, “like a time capsule.” That sent Clough into a frenzy in which he immersed himself in code books and cipher books, and then reached out to the sort of furniture makers who specialize in hidden closets.

All of that was tied into gizmos Mr. Clough, Ms. Bensko and others in their office hid in the apartment — without telling the clients — in a way that is almost too complicated to explain. Designing and producing the apartment’s hidden features, however, including its book and music, took four years, said Mr. Clough, who absorbed much of the cost in terms of his own billable hours, and relied on the generosity of more than 40 friends and artisans who became captivated by the project.

[The mystery] remained largely unnoticed by its inhabitants for quite some time after they moved in, in May of 2006. Then one night four months later, Cavan Klinsky, who is now 11, had a friend over. The boy was lying on the floor in Cavan’s bedroom, staring at dozens of letters that had been cut into the radiator grille. They seemed random — FDYDQ, for example. But all of a sudden the friend leapt up with a shriek, Ms. Sherry said, having realized that they were actually a cipher (a Caesar Shift cipher, to be precise), and that Cavan’s name was the first word.

Once the family received their first real clue via mail, they were dogged about solving it. That’s actually the part of this interesting tale that bothers me most — all of that work went into making this unique apartment, and the mystery was solved something like two weeks later if the article is to be believed.

Give me a puzzle house that lasts a decade! Why, oh, why don’t I have all the money in the world with which to build it?

How’s this for a slick little set-up? A certain Leah and her husband Will created this chill kitchenside bar using a bunch of bits of shelving. That’s actually all I know — were the pieces meant to be used this way? Beats me!

Who cares? It works, and it’s replicable. You want to talk about an easy DIY project? Hit up Target, score some shelving, and line up your booze. Voila! Your liquor is conveniently out of the way, and you can brag to your peeps that you have built yourself a bar in your closet-sized apartment.

I tagged this post with “DIY” but I’ll have you know that I have absolutely no idea how to create a stencil or make wall panels. I can stretch a canvas, but I would need to consult an expert when it comes to printing something on one.

Too bad that the crafty gal who whipped up these wonderful Doctor Who wall panels didn’t post instructions! I’m crying tiny tears right now out of abject jealousy.

A certain taerowyn crafted these for a fellow crafter during some sort of Doctor Who/Torchwood maillove swapfest. In her own words:

Basically, it’s nine 6′x6′ canvases that can hang in any way. I envision this kind of 3×3 grid, but you could do it as a border near the ceiling, or hang in a pattern of less than nine and then swap them out depending on your mood etc.

I only wish I had intercepted the USPS package so these would be mine, all mine.

When I was but a wee lass, I remember being absolutely scandalized by a light switch cover my father’s friends had in their bathroom. It was in the shape of a flasher with his trademark trench. Apparently, said flasher didn’t find waiting around in the dark terribly exciting, but when one flipped on the light, whoa. Hopefully, you get the picture and I don’t need to explain it further. For those who remain perplexed, here is a similar light switch cover.

It is because I can picture that one tiny home accessory so clearly after all these years that I will never buy anything remotely like this:

I don’t want my future children coming home from college for a Christmas visit and saying, “Mom, do you remember those sick coat hooks you and dad had when I was a kid? Well, those freaked us the hell out.”

Every manufacturer of everything everywhere has hits and misses. Now I’m cool with Kohler — The Beard and I just basically fell into imposed brand loyalty because all of the faucets and sinks in the house are Kohlers. That’s all right, though, because everything (thankfully!) is to my liking. It would pain me to have to have to replace perfectly functional fixtures.

Yet, as in all things, there is balance in the house of Kohler. For every win, there is a loss. For every extreme, there is something that can be defined as squarely middle of the road.

The good:

Kohler’s Crimson Topaz reminds me of the time I spent living in Costa Rica, if only because my mother’s friend’s sink was full of flowers, just like this one. I suppose it’s not in keeping with everyone’s tastes, but it’s quite in line with mine…provided it’s housed in a bathroom otherwise devoid of devoid of girly stuff.

The bad(ish):

I almost like this…I want to like it, but I just can’t get past the fact that the Kohler Tellieur looks like it belongs in a restaurant bathroom. Or maybe I’m just not modern and/or hip enough to appreciate it?

The (seriously) ugly:

You know your personal style is pretty firmly established when you’re seriously considering theKohler Zanzibar sink. I have to admit that I do love animal prints, but if your home has enough of them to warrant this sink then you and I need to have a serious talk.